Applying to Schools

Generally, your application process should look like this:

1: clear all of the ostriches out of the room.  They will be of no help at all.
2: Figure out which schools you want to apply to.  Don't apply to schools you aren't interested in, and don't apply to schools that you know nothing about (unless you can just check a box on your common app and there is no fee or essay.  You can apply to all of those that you want. (Whitworth  is one of them)).
3: Fill out the common app.  This will give you a good idea of what other apps will be like.  Don't worry about following their stupid essay prompts, just check the "other" box and use an essay you have already written.
4: Link all of the schools you are applying to that use the common app to your app.  Write the individual essays that they require - these will be stupid and repetitive.
5: Start applying to the schools that don't accept the common app.  Write those essays - shockingly, these will also be stupid and repetitive.
6: Pay your fees.  (You might have to sell one of your kidneys on the black market.  Use Dq. Twitchz - he makes that scars straight instead of jagged).
7: Wait.

This whole process will take you a couple months and will be very annoying.  Do it in little pieces or you will die.

Do's:
- Reuse your essays when you can.  Schools don't compare notes and a lot of the prompts are similar so you can rework your "Why do you want to go to Willamette?" paragraph to work for the "What attracted you to SPU?" paragraph.  Same thing for "Why is faith an important feature of education?" and "What do you look for in a faith-based educational experience?"  Really, colleges, just once I want an original essay prompt.  If you find a college that asks you to explain in detail the first time you accidentally ate cat poop out of your sand-box, I want to see that app.
- Take breaks.  Colleges aren't documenting how long it takes you to fill out your apps.  Do one section of one app each night so that you don't chuck your computer out the window after hours and hours of answering the same 52.36 questions over and over again.
- Reward yourself.  Every time you finish an app, take a night off and go hang out with friends.  Most apps have 5 or 6 parts so see if you can synchronize your progress with a couple other peakers.  That way you can cheer each other on.
- Apply to free common apps.  If a school sends you a spam letter that says you can apply free with no essay by just clicking a box on your common app, do it.  You would be stupid not to because those are the kinds of schools that give really good scholarships and then you can use your full ride to University of Perkins Restaurant to bargain with the school that you really want to attend so they will give you more money.

Don't's:
- Never type the short answer questions directly in the box that they provide.  There's no spell-check there.  Copy and paste from a word document so that you don't misspell the college's name.  Twice.
- Please don't lie.  This seems obvious but it is easy to fudge little things like checking the boxes for "Senior" and "Junior" year instead of just "Senior" year when you fill out how long you were president of Thespians.  It looks bad when the paperwork that the school sends is different from what you fill out.
- Avoid hitting "submit" until you have triple-checked everything - especially decimal points.  It sucks to only realize that you typed your GPA as .39 instead of 3.9 after you hit send.

Good luck!